I’m sure that I am deluded about what I really am. In a way, I think everyone is, everyone sees themselves in a much different light than the general public. Those who are closest to you see all your flaws and all of your virtues, while those who don’t know you so well tend to only see one or the other. But when it’s you who begins to analyze yourself, you can explain away all the things that may tarnish your image because you know the context of the action. What spurred it, what you were thinking, how you felt, etc. I know that I’ve fucked up a lot in my life. I know that I am an emotional, ridiculous, condescending asshole sometimes. But I also know the good in me.
That all being said, I realize that my perception of people probably isn’t accurate, but I still find myself not really trying to put myself into other people’s shoes. For example, I don’t care how you are feeling inside, it is never ok for you to mess around with someone else’s husband, even if you “did it for you”. I don’t care how sincerely or repeatedly you apologize, somethings can never be forgotten. If you’ve proved yourself to be a dick to me despite your nice guy image, you will from now on be considered a dick by myself and everyone who holds me dear to them. And they will stick up for me when I cannot stick up for myself. Even when I beg them not to.
No Comments on "Part of a Draft: 12/13/2008"